Funny Halloween Poems

It's was more of the same in 2009, with a selection of poems about Halloween which mixed humour and misanthropy, together with a strange new Halloween-Christmas hybrid poem.

The Costumed Army

It’s here again
That day we all dread
When once more
We fear the rise of the dead

But fear not
Our salvation is at hand
We shall be saved
By an unlikely Band

So be assured
When the time is near
Ghosts and ghouls
Will all quake in fear

When night falls
All the undead will cower
Trembling in awe
Come the witching hour

As armed with sacks
Our great costumed army
Will roam the streets
To drive the evil spirits barmy

So to protect yourselves
Keep a proper payment handy
When the costumed army
Come knocking for some candy


Two old Women
In long black cloaks
With point hats
And two black cats

'We're Imelda
And Griselda'
Said one. But which
Should I call witch...

Christmas Herald

The Christmas lights are up
The shops play Christmas tunes
The Santas are out in force
In their red and white platoons
Christmas goodies are on display
The best selections ever seen
Which sends the message out
That it’s nearly Halloween