Funny Sex Poems

A selection of Paul Curtis' funny poems about sex and all things sexual. In essence, the humorous sex poems are a sub-species of dirty poems with have a specifically sexual theme, but it doesn't do to over analyse such things…

Hi’s And Lo’s

A poem which takes the twin topics of funambulism and fellatio and fuses them into a deliciously funny poetic confection.


Cutting quickly to the chase, Quickies is a poem which is hard to introduce without revealing its surprising denouement. Read it and discover all...

Cynthia’s Night Out

Sometimes poems are more like jokes in verse form and this is certainly the case in Cynthia's Night Out. It's a very long, very funny poem about young Cynthia's introduction to sex...    a sort of shaggy shag story.

It’s Amazing Grace

Another joke poem, which is both shorter and in its own way much longer than its predecessor.


A poem about a bimbette (now isn't than an evocative word) and the confusions that arise when she discovers that she is pregnant.


A feisty poem about what happens when two hotel guests cross swords in a shared hotel bathroom. And no, crossed swords isn't a euphemism; Paul's much blunter than that.

Love Maker

A funny poem about love which begins innocently enough, but which builds towards an unexpected and disturbing climax.

Bella Donna

A salutary tale about the dangers of sharing an umbrella...

Tight Fit

A surprising graphic poem in which the protagonist grapples with his girlfriend's undersized and overstretched undergarments.


A funny poem about sex and old age, or perhaps more correctly a funny poem about the lack of sex as one gets older.

Anything Goes

Are we on a slippery slope of declining moral standards? Answers on a rather large postcard.


A poem about party for swingers which has a slightly nostalgic feel. Surely the internet has done away with all that car key mallarky.