Men's Ads

When the boot is on
The other foot it is no easier
Looking in the Men’s Ads
You’ll find them even sleazier
Finding men in the Personals
Is a minefield to be truthful
But here are a few pointers,
Which may be thought useful
Chose a man Well Educated
And knowledgeable too
You will spend a boring evening
As he patronizes you
He may modestly claim
To be only average looking
Meaning that from his ears
And nose there is hair sprouting
If he says he is a sensitive man
Means he cries to readily
And if he is very sensitive
Means he is gay, definitely
If he likes to cuddle means
He’s insecure and very scary
Huggable means he’s overweight
And also rather hairy
If he claims he is good looking
He is arrogant rather
And if he says he’s mature
Means he’s older than your father
A “Free Spirit” will perform
With a variety of subjects
And “Friendship first” is fine
As long as it ends with sex
If he claims he has an athletic bent
And is fit, physically
Then he certainly watches
Too much sport on telly
And if he says he’s forty-ish
He’s probably fifty-three
And if you’re only twenty-five
You’re far too old you see
And if perhaps he claims to be
A very Open-minded lover
Means he’ll have sex
With your sister and your mother

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