First Aid

Invaluable advice for men who have to resuscitate female patients, but are unsure where the boundaries of taste or decency lie.


Poems of Life and Death


Funny Poems about Health


Do’s And Don’ts

When you find a woman
Collapsed upon the floor
DO loosen her clothing
But only about her neck or waist
DON’T remover her under garments
DO check her pulse
At the wrist or neck
DON’T go straight for her groin
DO check for a heartbeat
This can be done by listening
If no pulse or heartbeat is present
DO perform CPR
This does NOT involve squeezing her breasts
If necessary DO give mouth to mouth
DO ensure airway is clear
DON’T use your tongue
If CPR has been successful
DO Place her in the recovery position
DON’T put her head in your lap
Especially NOT face down

Copyright © Paul Curtis. All Rights Reserved

first previous index next last